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~Myblackisblacker:iconMyblackisblacker:

Vanilla Tragedy  

  • Status: Member
  • Model
  • Female/United States
  • Invisible
  • Deviant since Sep 8, 2005, 2:47 AM
  • 131 Deviations
  • 43 Scraps [browse]
  • 3,552 Deviation Comments
  • 1,519 Deviant Comments
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  • 24,219 Pageviews

Bundles of Christmas Joy

Journal Entry: Thu Dec 27, 2007, 12:50 PM
  • Mood: Thrilled
  • Playing: Drawn to Life for DS
  • Eating: very late breakfast
On December 25 beginning at 1:58 a.m. my two sisters and brother were born. The babies were pre-term, but healthy. Sophie, Penelope and Aaron are staying at a hospital in San Diego in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit for as little as two weeks, but possibly as long as four. They can breathe on their own without a ventilator, and are almost able to eat on their own.

Last night I saw them for the first time. They are so small! They weigh around four or five pounds each. They are being fed intravenously, and they have all these monitors on them and stuff. It was very overwhelming. They have the tiniest little voices, and the smallest toes I've ever seen. Our mom is doing well, in a lot of pain from the C-section, but very proud of her new babies.

I want them to come home, because I don't know if I can handle going back to the NICU...

Devious Information

  • Current Age: 21
  • Current Residence: San Diego, California, USA
  • Interests: art, gothic industrial music, writing, sleeping, my rats: Sneakers and Professor Hyde White, ABDL
  • Favourite movie: The Crow/The Jacket/Clue/Fight Club/Pirates of the Carribean/Fear and Loathing/ Usual Suspects
  • Favourite band or musician: VNV Nation/ Fleshfield/Wolfsheim/Icon of Coil/Apoptygma Berserk/NCC/Cut.Rate.Box/DEPECHE MODE/TBM
  • Favourite genre of music: gothic-industrial, industrial, ebm, jungle, darkwave
  • Favourite artist: My sister :devBluepop:, umm, lots of others...
  • Favourite poet or writer: Stephen King, Trent Reznor
  • Favourite photographer: cosfrog.deviantart.com * elusiveTouch.deviantart.com
  • Operating System: Limbic System 2k6
  • MP3 player of choice: Ipod, and um as far as the computer ones...anything that's NOT Realplayer
  • Shell of choice: Um...the shiny pretty ones?
  • Wallpaper of choice: the kind they put in nurseries! ^o^
  • Skin of choice: Michael's :3
  • Favourite game: Fatal Frame Series/Silent Hill Series/Resident Evil Series/Kingdom Hearts/Final Fantasy Series/Halo2
  • Favourite gaming platform: Plastation2/Nintendo DS
  • Favourite cartoon character: Shake (ATHF), Grumpy Bear, Ed (FMA), Spike (Bebop), Writhe and Shine from comic of the same name
  • Personal Quote: She has a wiggle in her walk, a giggle in her talk, and when she sings it almost breaks your heart
  • Tools of the Trade: piece of 8.5x11 paper, a carebears mechanical pencil and a broken heart

deviantART Notice

Devious Comments

*FreakyLaurent:iconFreakyLaurent: 6 days 6 hours ago
Nice gallery !

:D

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Please do check out my - :gallery: [link]
~m0r0se:iconm0r0se: Apr 14, 2008, 3:35:00 AM
i still got another week of spring break.

it might be different in the uk,but we can only apply to 3 places through 'route B' (the art side of UCAS (the university application system) ) and some universities only look at applicants who put them as first.that was the problem of my second choice and i just didn't really have time or the oppurtunity to visit other universities.

i don't if the uk use a grade point system??-alot of the details i don't know aboat :/

i'm sure you'll be fine.do you want to study art?

what part of america do you live in?what schools are good in america?

i want to go to a university in london.

if so,i would say it all counts on your work.do lots of drawings and photos and thats you're best chance.i think it's sort of easier for art people to get into university than other heavy academic subjects,like the sciences or math..........,but then maybe academics can't draw so good,so it balances out ;)

i probably won't apply again,i'm 25,so if i waited another year (i can't reapply untill next year,if i wanted to apply again)and started then,i wouldn't graduate untill i was 29 and i sort of want my life sorted out - job,van,girlfriend,kid(??) by 30.

in the time between finding out i didn't even get an interview and now,i've thought aboat the whole 'going to university' concept and i'm sort of over it.for the most part,i don't really enjoy or am into most of the art scene - i really don't like the blank white walls of galleries and the pretentious and ego air they seem to carry as soon asyou walk through the door.

i just want to draw alternative comics that people download and carry with them or are in the magazine pile of a tattoo/piercing parlour.i want to speak to the outcasts who feel alone and show them it's better to be different,than like evrybody else.i don't want to make loads of money or be in a gallery.that side of it seems really pathetic to me.

i think my view or outlook goes against the collective concious of the art society - i get into so much trouble for wanting to using biro to produce work at college.

i hope being back at work goes ok,you can still sit around and do nothing.......,when you get home after work ;)

speak to you later

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m0r0se is not a mood - it's a lifestyle
~Myblackisblacker:iconMyblackisblacker: Apr 12, 2008, 7:10:17 PM
Well thanks! :)
:rose:

--
"When my voice ceases to be, will the echo still remain? When there's nothing left of me, will my memory still go on?"

NeedyouDreamyouFindyouTasteyouUseyouScaryouFuckyouBreakyou
~Myblackisblacker:iconMyblackisblacker: Apr 12, 2008, 7:09:48 PM
I'm so sorry to hear that that happened! That sucks :( Stuff is okay with me. I'm sad though because my spring break from work is over on monday. I miss sitting around doing nothing all the time! Oh well.

you can apply for other universities,though can't you? I'm only in junior college so I haven't had to apply yet. I doubt I could get into a good school though, with my grade point average....

--
"When my voice ceases to be, will the echo still remain? When there's nothing left of me, will my memory still go on?"

NeedyouDreamyouFindyouTasteyouUseyouScaryouFuckyouBreakyou
~WithinObssessed:iconWithinObssessed: Apr 11, 2008, 6:19:14 PM
i wasn't trying to get any kind of reaction like dat jest stating a fact is all. well some could debate whether it's a fact but it is at least my opinion.

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If you can't do something smart do something right!
~Myblackisblacker:iconMyblackisblacker: Apr 11, 2008, 11:28:53 AM
Thank you so much! When someone says that to me I'm no the type to go "yes dahling, I know." ;) In fact it's nice to hear every so often because I'm not too bright in that I sometimes am quite doubtful of myself.
Thank you for your sweet compliments! :heart:

--
"When my voice ceases to be, will the echo still remain? When there's nothing left of me, will my memory still go on?"

NeedyouDreamyouFindyouTasteyouUseyouScaryouFuckyouBreakyou
~m0r0se:iconm0r0se: Apr 10, 2008, 11:41:58 AM
oh,I see.

I think babygoth would look really good,I will try and draw it and post it up :)

thats very cool that photographers approach you for their shoots :)

how goes stuff with you?

I failed getting into university to do an illustration degree.didn't even get an interview :( I don't want to work in hmv forever! :/

thanks for your reply,I'll speak to you again soon

take care

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m0r0se is not a mood - it's a lifestyle
~WithinObssessed:iconWithinObssessed: Apr 9, 2008, 6:54:43 PM
And i know you probably get this all the time but your beautiful. Both inside and out.

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If you can't do something smart do something right!
~Myblackisblacker:iconMyblackisblacker: Apr 9, 2008, 6:12:06 PM
Wow! Thank you so much, I'm very honored! :heart: I'm really pleased that you think so! I think art is about openness, it is afterall a way to express yourself. Your Self, as in, who you are. Thank you for your comment!! :heart: :heart:

--
"When my voice ceases to be, will the echo still remain? When there's nothing left of me, will my memory still go on?"

NeedyouDreamyouFindyouTasteyouUseyouScaryouFuckyouBreakyou
~Myblackisblacker:iconMyblackisblacker: Apr 9, 2008, 6:00:12 PM
It depends on the arrangement. if I come to a photographer with an idea I want to shoot (which with the ab ones was what I did) then usually you have to pay them for their service. If he recruits me for something he wants to do, then they pay me.

Hehehe babygoth, that would be kind of funny! :D

--
"When my voice ceases to be, will the echo still remain? When there's nothing left of me, will my memory still go on?"

NeedyouDreamyouFindyouTasteyouUseyouScaryouFuckyouBreakyou
~WithinObssessed:iconWithinObssessed: Mar 31, 2008, 9:36:03 PM
i admire how u are able to show all of yourself to the da community and would like to say that that really is worthy of anyones respect... even mine which is the greatest compliment i can give. very few have.

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If you can't do something smart do something right!
~m0r0se:iconm0r0se: Mar 31, 2008, 9:47:30 AM
you should do a gothic/alternative style shoot with the nappy underneeth.

yep,i've heard bambinos are meant to be really good.the thickest one you can buy???I heven't bought any of this type yet,but they're the next pack to get :)

I thought the photographer pays the model,not the other way round?

I think alot of,or some of the best works,are the really personal ones.it's the most profound subject to create with.

speek too yoo laater

take care

Dan

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m0r0se is not a mood - it's a lifestyle
~Myblackisblacker:iconMyblackisblacker: Mar 30, 2008, 7:50:20 PM
Thanks so much! Thats what I was aiming for. It's a really important part of a lot of people's lives, and I'd hate to make light of it. It comes of as some kind of trashy porn when the models/actors do it. There's just no sincerity.

--
"When my voice ceases to be, will the echo still remain? When there's nothing left of me, will my memory still go on?"

NeedyouDreamyouFindyouTasteyouUseyouScaryouFuckyouBreakyou
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~Myblackisblacker:iconMyblackisblacker: Mar 30, 2008, 7:47:56 PMComment hidden by Owner
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~TheMorphling:iconTheMorphling: Mar 29, 2008, 11:30:10 AM
Yeah, they really are unique... 99% of it out there is just actors/models (badly) catering to the fetish side of it. You treat it really respectfully.
~Myblackisblacker:iconMyblackisblacker: Mar 28, 2008, 3:13:48 PM
Thank you so much, I'm glad you like them. :) Those were important to me because I didn't want it to come across like everything else - overly sexual and sometimes sort of campy. It's nice to meet another, and nice to meet someone who likes my stuff :heart: ^^

--
"When my voice ceases to be, will the echo still remain? When there's nothing left of me, will my memory still go on?"

NeedyouDreamyouFindyouTasteyouUseyouScaryouFuckyouBreakyou
~TheMorphling:iconTheMorphling: Mar 27, 2008, 1:28:47 PM
Heya, finally got around to making a DA account. I'm a TBDL, and I keep seeing you pop up on a bunch of TBDL related art. :D

The photos are really good.
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~m0r0se:iconm0r0se: Mar 25, 2008, 10:06:05 AMComment hidden by Owner
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~m0r0se:iconm0r0se: Mar 25, 2008, 2:06:15 AMComment hidden by Owner
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~Myblackisblacker:iconMyblackisblacker: Mar 22, 2008, 1:31:43 PM
Thank you! I try to represent it as more of a lifestyle than a fetish like most people think. I'd love to do an ab shoot again sometime, I just have to find a photog who wants to do it. Thanks for your support! :-)

--
"When my voice ceases to be, will the echo still remain? When there's nothing left of me, will my memory still go on?"

NeedyouDreamyouFindyouTasteyouUseyouScaryouFuckyouBreakyou
~m0r0se:iconm0r0se: Mar 19, 2008, 2:09:01 AM
hey,I'm abdl too.

i like how you represent it in your art and how you take pride and are so open about it,I feel I have to hide it.I think you should do more.

speek too yoo laater.

take care.

(I don't know how to add friends on DA,maybe add me???)
~Myblackisblacker:iconMyblackisblacker: Mar 16, 2008, 1:48:23 PM
:giggle: thanks for stopping by! And welcome to DA :)

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"When my voice ceases to be, will the echo still remain? When there's nothing left of me, will my memory still go on?"

NeedyouDreamyouFindyouTasteyouUseyouScaryouFuckyouBreakyou
~Myblackisblacker:iconMyblackisblacker: Mar 14, 2008, 4:34:54 PM
No problem! :) It was well worth it, I do enjoy discovering good art here on DA :heart:

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"When my voice ceases to be, will the echo still remain? When there's nothing left of me, will my memory still go on?"

NeedyouDreamyouFindyouTasteyouUseyouScaryouFuckyouBreakyou
=dracanta:icondracanta: Mar 14, 2008, 9:20:44 AM
hi m'dear! Thanks a bunch for passing by and for the kind words :)

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keep on trying 'till you run out of cake ಠ_ಠ